The descriptions you’re going to read below are short and do not encompass the whole of each type of guy. This is merely an introduction and not meant to be anything more.
You might find very few men travel from one type to another over the course of their lives but mostly, will stay within their own type. You may also find a guy can generally act out from each of those roles but it does not mean that’s the category they belong in.
We can definitely discuss more in detail below and comments are ALWAYS encouraged to better understand this complex issue.
But for now…
Here’s a minimal description of the jerk, the bad boy, the player, and of course… the nice guy.
He exhibits signs of over-confidence. He is the jealous type. He has a short temper and it’s all too easy to bring out his anger. He demeans others. Shows very little respect for anyone, anytime.
Taken to the extreme he will disregard the law and often find himself in jail because of it.
Women who find themselves continually attracted to jerks generally suffer from low self-esteem. They may also shows signs of being overly confident themselves. Therefore they match up perfectly with the jerk.
They thrive on drama which can make their lives feel important. They thrive on causing problems to distract themselves from living their lives with self-acceptance.
The Bad Boy.
The bad boy lives on the edge but he often won’t take you with him. In other words he shows respect for others more than he normally shows for himself. I’ve known many bad boys in my life that honestly, were pretty cool guys.
He can be tough to befriend and this causes some people to confuse him with the jerk because if you’re not his friend chances are, he will not give two shits about you.
The women who are attracted to this type of guy constantly are often high quality, career minded, successful, models, etc… This is because their lives have had strict guidelines and the bad boy offers an alternative to it plus fun and excitement too.
Their experiences together might only last a short time so she can always go right back to living her strict life. But… she will continually think about having him for her own. Just the fact she can not ever tie him down gives her competitive nature a major challenge.
Remember she’s succeeded and won many times in her life. So this challenge can become so overwhelming that she may end up “still single” up to the age of forty.
The player is the guy who manipulates feelings. He’s a player so the game is always on. I hear women talk about players all the time. I’ve found women who talk a great deal about hating this type, are players themselves without even knowing it.
The game exists to him as a marker in his life achievements. As in how many women he can sleep with. How many things he can get from women.
They play a game and seek a trophy to show off or the game is lost. However the confidence or self-esteem they are seeking can never be found through their tactical outer-game but they will cling to the limited belief that it can be.
The women who are attracted to players will often just use them right back. Most of the time as a one night stand. The “perceived” great sex without the fear of either one getting too attached.
I rarely have met any type of woman who can be fooled by this guy for very long. Once they are found out many women have no problem never seeing him again.
Which by the way, works great in his favor.
The Nice Guy.
Chances are if you’re reading this you’re a nice guy and a guy who refuses to change his nice guys ways to get more women.
You’ve been friend-ed so many times in your life it often hurts just to think about it.
You fall in love easily, get hooked on one woman, and suffer the same series events over and over again then you chalk it up as just a part of who you are.
That hurts. I know it does because I’ve been there.
Most nice guys will settle for what they feel is not what they were looking for. Some may even find happiness and live a comfortable life BUT I’ve found personally it’s usually a complacent life.
It’s easier just to give in and each day it becomes harder to see anything else.
The women who are attracted to nice guys are everywhere! Yes. Lots of great women, no matter what her goals are in life, want a nice guy. Just like you and I they do not enjoy being treated like shit or manipulated.
Yet when a nice guy can not give her any kind of emotional shift, or can exhibit at least an average confidence with a sense of purpose or passion in their lives, they just do not feel enough attraction for him.
They too may settle for him but are more likely to become a different person to him or worse yet, cheating on him to gain that emotional high or the passion in their lives they are living for.
The Truth May Hurt or Sting…
Gather all the jerks, bad boys, and players into a group and I can guarantee they’ve slept with or dated a large proportion of the female population.
Compare that to such a small amount of nice guys who are getting what they want and it’s easy to see who and why they are getting the larger share of women.
Let’s not get too discouraged here there is a big reason why this is true and once you begin to understand how it all works you’ll find you can use this invaluable information to get the women you want, and still be that nice guy.
Then stay with me here because…
Jerks act like jerks because it is who they are. Their false confidence can never fully protect their self-esteem so they unwittingly will try to steal yours.
Bad Boys are rebels, deviants, and such because it is who they are. The can live with integrity and self-acceptance but often lack when it comes to living life purposely.
Players choose to be players and are searching for something in the wrong place. As I stated earlier they never achieve inner completeness by using outer-game tactics.
In each of those cases the underlying attractive emotions these men create is just that, an emotion which stirs frustration, mystery, excitement, and even a small amount of fear of loss.
The nice guy often fails to stir those emotions and then tries to appeal to her logical side.
Which is where he typically fails.
He wants her to figure out if she likes him and unfortunately for him she can not arbitrarily decide her emotions or feelings of attraction.
She can only decide to act on them.
I’ve listed 14 ways in which any man can increase his chance of attracting any women by appealing to her emotions. These are based on how the other three groups naturally do it through their self-destructive personalities.
My Nice Guy’s Approach to Attraction is simply put:
And every one of those can be accomplished naturally.
You CAN learn to attract others without games, tricks, or lies, using the same “techniques” the others use but not in a negative way.
FIRST RULE: Never direct it towards any one woman in particular.
It is about developing yourself into someone who knows who they are, and then builds on that indefinitely.
By doing so you’ll have more to give in a relationship and you will effectively develop the more naturally attractive traits which are already within you.
When you struggle with any question about if what you’re doing is correct…
Stop! Then ask immediately yourself:
“Am I doing ‘this’ just to get a girl, or am I doing it because it’s what a mature man does?”
I can guarantee when you do anything for any one woman you will only push her away unless you incorporate some major “friends zone escape” steps.
Learn to attract the masses and you’ll be much better off.
Learn to take “her” out of YOUR equation.
If nothing seems to be working for you then you need a quick education on how attraction really works for women.
Trust me it’s not a logical thing she turns on and off.
My first suggestion is always to read the very first book which showed me how “Attraction Isn’t A Choice“. Get it and read it immediately! You won’t be disappointed.
The next chapter will be coming soon…